Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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