At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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