she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
