I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
