I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
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