I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
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