i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
