Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Randomize
