We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
