He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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