Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
