they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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