just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Randomize
