the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
