So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
This is my gift to your gina
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
