i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
