I want to make a zoo with you.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize