Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
