i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
