I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
