so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
