i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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