he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
