I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
