we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize