blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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