Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He has the fingertips of a God
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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