How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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