My brain says no but my pants say off.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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