youre lurking in front of me
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
