Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
