I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
do herpes really smell.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
