what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
