And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
sex in a hospital.. check
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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