i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
