u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
