dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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