ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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