i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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