Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
