Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I just want to make out with him forever
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize