I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
