I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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