used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Be still, my beating vagina.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
