she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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