So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
