Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
