Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
i drank out of a bidet.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
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