That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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