This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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